Friday, April 1, 2011

nonsense stress

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

With today officially being Friday (even though I haven't gone to bed yet...), I'm finding myself starting to get a bit nervous that we haven't heard back from the midwife yet. That's right, we told a stranger before we told all of you. Necessity. Midwives here in Manitoba are extremely hard to aquire, and I don't think it's a secret to many people that I am desperately seeking a homebirth. Thus, my second call to brag about being newly pregnant was to the midwife's office to go through the intake process.
Five or six short questions later, and they tell you they'll send your information to the three other offices in the city as well, and call you within fourteen days. fourteen days! That's an eternity! I don't care if I don't see the midwife for several weeks, but I really really want to know if I have one. Not to mention the handful of questions they asked hardly seems enough to determine if they'll take you on as a client. I mean on paper, it all sounds great, no medical issues, I'm young, no previous pregnancy complications, I have a support person, and I want a homebirth, great!
But then they don't call you back for a week, and I start wondering about the things that could be better. This could be a second pregnancy, with the first one completely healthy and normal with an unmedicated, uncomplicated delivery. I could live 5 minutes from the hospital, and be a runner with extreme endurance and stamina... I could... I could...  it's impossible to go through all the options and scenarios without driving yourself bat crazy.
The reality is, I don't need to worry. I've got another week, I  "present" well, and if nothing else... well then, we'll make it work. But my gosh, this is sure nervewracking in the meantime!


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